:: Dain's blog of eternal stench. ::

:: Friday, July 25, 2003 ::

Tonight at Mac's was pretty uneventful. We drew pictures!.. and we talked!

And Paul showed up. And he talked for a bit before leaving. Then we talked some more. Then Steve and Keg showed up and they didn't talk much because they smoked themselves retarded on the pot :P (the pot... heh) Then Steve and Keg got pizza... which made us all even more hungry than we were... So Heath left... then Sarah left a while later... then Teagz showed up briefly and left... then I went into Mac's to talk to Keg and Steve for a bit... then they went up to Keg's place to get beverages and I went home...

And that brings us to now. Me sitting here with a headache from not falling asleep until 8 am last night and waking up at both noon and 3 pm... and updating my blog with pointless Mac's details that really aren't very detailed. Wee. I'm hungry >_> <_< I wish I had one o' them Hungry Man breakfasts... those things are tasty as all hell. God damn, I'm making myself hungrier now... *posts and goes to get food*
:: Dain 10:53 PM [+] ::
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I just want to let Teagz know that anytime she needs to talk about anything, she can feel free to call me. Seriously.

I've said it before multiple times, and I still mean it. Something tells me she forgets I said that... or that she thinks I don't mean it anymore. Just a feeling I've been getting lately.
:: Dain 3:39 PM [+] ::
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Woo... 5 hours of sleep, black coffee and no cigarettes. Yeah, I'm in the best mood EVER for today -_-... Something else to piss me off would be a rather bad idea right now... at least until I get a cigarette from my sister...

Got cigarette from dad, calmed down now. :D

Oh yeah.. I got that thing off my chest... but I did it over the phone. It felt forced and just didn't seem right. I'd really prefer to do it properly in person :/
:: Dain 9:42 AM [+] ::
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First things first: Actions do NOT speak louder than words.

Now, the way things are going, I don't think I'm ever going to get this one thing off my chest. Ever. Just found myself hating myself as I walked home. And it's all because I'm never going to find the courage or the right moment to get this thing off my chest. I ended up crying. Because I'm never going to say it. I've told her there is something I want to say, but she doesn't know what it is. And I'm probably never going to be able to tell her. Because I'm a fucking idiot. Because I'm afraid. I'm afraid of the fucking consequences.

I know she'll probably read this.

I almost got hit in the eye with a piece of broken CD, and I don't care.

I just read Teagan's livejournal upon coming home, and am really not affected by its newest contents all that much. I may be a little pissed off, for obvious reasons (Which she should be able to figure out), but I really don't care that much. It's her life, and she can do what she wants. In fact, reading it made me a little less depressed. I still hate myself, but for reasons unrelated to the contents of her livejournal.

She and I did have plans to go up and visit my mom tomo... today (stupid midnight)... but I believe I'm getting blown off. That pisses me off a little as well. If so, then I'll probably not visit my mom. Not out of anger or anything.. but because I'd much rather have Teagz with me when I visit my mom this time. Last time I went up there, I talked to her for a bit, went on the internet on her computer.. ate her pie.. then left... I need someone else there to fill out the conversation.

Anyway, that's all for tonight. Feeling better having written all of this down... may go nurse my toe... (stubbed it on my dresser... stupid furniture :P).. may go cry to continue getting that emotion out... but I'll be completely fine after I sleep. Definitely. It'll all pass once I get some sleep... or coffee.. depending on whether or not I feel like sleeping tonight.

Actually, I'm apparently already cheered up enough by my own stupid comments (damn you dresser! *shakes fist*) to not need that cry. Or that coffee/sleep. Whatever. See you all on here in like.. a week or something.
:: Dain 12:37 AM [+] ::
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